• [ network ]
  • goatmatrix.net
  • gvid.tv
  • img.gvid.tv
  • games.gvid.tv
  • apps.gvid.tv
HomeUploadUpload DirectHotlinkRandomAbouttheme toggle
Expand

Remy: Horrifying Tweets Resurface

Views:860
@ReasonVids

Remy returns to the news desk to bring you what passes for journalism these days.

Written and Performed by Remy.
Music tracks mastered by Ben Karlstrom.
Produced and Edited by Austin Bragg.

LYRICS:

Trudeau denies the report. Ed?
A rough week for Canada's first black prime minister. Thanks, Tim.

A problem long posed, now finally an answer
A cure has been found to a rare form of cancer.
We'll tell you who found it, what he thinks this means,
And dig up some tweets from his early teens.

Plus the Good Samaritan, whose quickness and breadth
Saved a family of four from a fiery death.
We'll ask how he did it, how he made it in time,
And why he tweeted this back in 2009.

Uh, Ed? Yes, Tim. Forgive the defiance
But I think we should focus on the news part, the science
And not what they tweeted back when they were 10
The science, hmm. I'll try it again.

Archaeologists have unearthed a series of tweets
Made by this local hero when he was 13.
Will this middle-school tweet soon mean his demise?
Our report might just win the Pulitzer Prize.

Pulitzer Prize? In what? Scrolling down?
We found immature things immature people wrote down.
Our country's at war and that's the story we sought?
War coverage, yes—I'll give it a shot.

This Navy SEAL unit is now under fire
For a series of tweets, we'll take our magnifier
And pay no attention to how their recent life's been
And tell you what you should think that says about them.

Says about them? What's it say about us?
That the first thing we do after someone's discussed
Is comb through their childhood looking for dirt.
OK, I can do this, I assure you I'm cured.

Well she's the first woman to serve on the board
Of our town's city council—and she just signed an accord.
We'll comb through the details of what she did write
And through years of her tweets in hopes of wrecking her life.

OK, see, I hate this, this is just what we do
Make things controversial for clicks and for views.
When we're covering news, should our first thought each time
Be "Let's find what they tweeted back when they were nine"?

Finally, millions can now walk thanks to his prosthesis
But a hateful hand signal when he was a fetus
Leads many to now question what he promotes.
We'll toss him in a well and see if he floats.

libertarian
,
reason magazine
,
reason.com
,
reason.tv
,
reasontv
    Thumbnail for The Movie "Miss Virginia" Powerfully Dramatizes the Urgent Need for School Choice10:26
    The Movie "Miss Virginia" Powerfully Dramatizes the Urgent Need for School Choice
    ReasonVids
    948 views
    Thumbnail for LA County Jail Officers Charged with Federal Crimes; Jail Monitors Respond4:58
    LA County Jail Officers Charged with Federal Crimes; Jail Monitors Respond
    ReasonVids
    1016 views
    Thumbnail for Harris 'i changed my shirt 'cause I shit my pants' Biden 2024 0:10
    Harris 'i changed my shirt 'cause I shit my pants' Biden 2024
    bestofupgoat
    229 views
    Thumbnail for Has there ever been a truly libertarian government?2:58
    Has there ever been a truly libertarian government?
    ReasonVids
    1349 views
    Thumbnail for How To Crate Train a Puppy | Chewtorials3:03
    How To Crate Train a Puppy | Chewtorials
    invidious
    395 views
    Thumbnail for Military Girl Throws Grenade into Wall & Falls Near to She | Trend Trix Rightful Management0:15
    Military Girl Throws Grenade into Wall & Falls Near to She | Trend Trix Rightful Management
    invidious
    343 views
    Thumbnail for What If We Created No Waste? | What If6:17
    What If We Created No Waste? | What If
    invidious
    345 views
    Thumbnail for BIG MIKE - Coming to a theater near you.1:11
    BIG MIKE - Coming to a theater near you.
    bestofupgoat
    215 views
    Thumbnail for Backrooms - The Search | A-Sync Research5:10
    Backrooms - The Search | A-Sync Research
    invidious
    400 views
    Thumbnail for SCUMP WATCH PARTY!! CDL MAJOR 1 WEEK 3!! | Scump4:01:54
    SCUMP WATCH PARTY!! CDL MAJOR 1 WEEK 3!! | Scump
    invidious
    365 views
    Thumbnail for การถ่ายทอดสด พิธีปิด การแข่งขันฟุตบอลจตุรมิตรสามัคคี ครั้งที่ 30 รอบชิงชนะเลิศ | TV5HD ONLINE6:44:06
    การถ่ายทอดสด พิธีปิด การแข่งขันฟุตบอลจตุรมิตรสามัคคี ครั้งที่ 30 รอบชิงชนะเลิศ | TV5HD ONLINE
    invidious
    353 views
    Thumbnail for Biden's Plan To Stop Ghost Guns Is Doomed To Fail9:33
    Biden's Plan To Stop Ghost Guns Is Doomed To Fail
    ReasonVids
    1005 views
    Thumbnail for Khó vậy cũng làm được |K2k3 #shorts | K2k3 Shorts0:14
    Khó vậy cũng làm được |K2k3 #shorts | K2k3 Shorts
    invidious
    338 views
    Thumbnail for Lays Full Fried Chicken | Crispy Hut0:33
    Lays Full Fried Chicken | Crispy Hut
    invidious
    165 views
    Thumbnail for when an object hits you at lightspeed | GrayStillPlays12:52
    when an object hits you at lightspeed | GrayStillPlays
    invidious
    415 views
    Thumbnail for We WERE Canadian! | The WhatsHerFace Show2:33
    We WERE Canadian! | The WhatsHerFace Show
    invidious
    202 views
    Thumbnail for Eric Garner Protesters Stage "Die-In" at Grand Central Station0:56
    Eric Garner Protesters Stage "Die-In" at Grand Central Station
    ReasonVids
    1041 views
    Thumbnail for That Mitchell and Webb Look - Football | soniiic2:29
    That Mitchell and Webb Look - Football | soniiic
    invidious
    318 views
    Thumbnail for Remy: Jim Carrey's Cold Dead Hand - A Rebuttal1:56
    Remy: Jim Carrey's Cold Dead Hand - A Rebuttal
    ReasonVids
    967 views
    Thumbnail for Halo 2 Classic - Team Slayer - Elongation (XBOX ONE) | Mystical Gaming7:14
    Halo 2 Classic - Team Slayer - Elongation (XBOX ONE) | Mystical Gaming
    invidious
    348 views
    Thumbnail for Thot Mistakes a Cactus for a Mattress3:45
    Thot Mistakes a Cactus for a Mattress
    bestofvoatxyz
    809 views
    Thumbnail for Charlie Puth, Ed Sheeran, Martin Garrix & Kygo, The Chainsmokers Style - Summer Nostalgia Mix1:00
    Charlie Puth, Ed Sheeran, Martin Garrix & Kygo, The Chainsmokers Style - Summer Nostalgia Mix
    invidious
    411 views
    Thumbnail for The TSA's 12 Banned Items of Christmas3:52
    The TSA's 12 Banned Items of Christmas
    ReasonVids
    951 views
    Thumbnail for The monumental free speech case the media ignored | ReasonTV5:19
    The monumental free speech case the media ignored | ReasonTV
    invidious
    403 views
    Thumbnail for Looter struggles to fit TV in 90s style toyota corolla.  Plunderproblem in Zuid-Afrika3:14
    Looter struggles to fit TV in 90s style toyota corolla. Plunderproblem in Zuid-Afrika
    Moonskaraos
    2015 views

points

Permalink
Reply
libertarian
,
reason magazine
,
reason.com
,
reason.tv
,
reasontv
TOS  •  Add Keywords  •  Donate  •   Analytics  •   DMCA  •   Puzzle